Dezdecaydance's Journals

We're all wasted

Im feelin all gloomy right now...i always have alot of time to sit and think about life...i hate to sound like pore dez all the time but...it sucks i remember there was a point in my life where i had the hottest lady friends in prattville..i was never at home..and now...everyone is pregnant or as already had a kid..its even that or they are in a hella serious relationship.i guess i should have chosen my friends better in the pass..i meen dont get me wrong i love them to death but man...it really sucks..they never want to go out to clubs thats all they want to do is go to house partys...i can write this blog because im sure they want ever take the time to read it cause they are way to consumed with thier child and/or bf.is 23 really that old???i dont think so...i think ppl are trying to grow up quick.i have always tried to keep intouch with my ex gfs.....but..wow the one i loved the most has now been reduced to some attention craving sausage fest crowd dweller...not only that but the guy shes interested in now looks like shrek...anyway that besides the point...the point is..there really isnt a reason for me to stay in prattville anymore..nobody cares about there old friend Dez lol..yea my car hasnt been working but even if it was they still arent willing to hang out.i thought my friends would be settling down at 25..not 19-20!!its all sad really... just a sad sad story...I wish things where the way they used to be...i wish u all would have waited about 2 more years b4 u started going down this road in your life..im hurt by it ...i meen i have a gf myslef but i would have never sold out like u all have..all i have is god,my gf,my job,and about 2 decent "best"friends.i been thinking about what im supposed to do with my life the past couple of days..I know i know i know i said i wanted to go to the Air Force..i know thats the smarest thing to do..but is it hat im SUPPOSED to be doing...idk...i just dont know anymore...nothing how i thought it would be right now.

Moving on

I want to move out of my house so freaken bad.im 23 still living with the rents..it sucks i hate it.I NEED MORE MONEY.everysense my car broke down i been kinda down on my luck.at one point i wanted to go to the air Force...im just soo indecisive.i dont know what i want to do.i love music. and fashion.but those arer both reallt hard thing to be great at u know??I try to network online as much as possible. Its all in who u know right?anyway so my girlfriend just started working as a server and shes making bigger tips than me!just cuz she has tits..i swear man..life isn't fair..that should be put on my tombstone..I work my butt off and make 15 bucks in tips some nights and this girl does the very same things i do and gets 50...there is no explanation for that.I love my gf though.At least she is on my team right?Well time to look for another job again. it sucks that nobody reads my blogs.

"black ppl dont tip well"

Yea its true..im a server at a restraunt and i hate serving black tables..for real its annoying.they always are very rude..white ppl are rude sometimes but most of the black tables i get are always tryin to get a free meal..its horribley sad..i really hate it.they spend 50 bucks on a meal and leave a 2 or 3 dollar tip..if u cant afford to tip then dont go out to eat.its pathetic..thats why so many ppl hate us..cuz there is a stereotype that lingers in the air about us and what do we do to stop it????nothin....im black and i hate serving black tables..sad.